Thursday, January 17, 2008

Poopy Mom

After reading several posts today of moms and the things they do with their kids, I have come to realize that I am a poopy mom. I need some advice from all the Super Moms out there which is all of you! Shelley has this great system going it seems and I would like to get to that point. She has a system where her girls have a timer and they get privileges according to the timer and there are no tangible prizes (i.e. toys, candy, etc.) which is what I have turned into doing and it isn't very effective I have found with Lauren, my youngest. My kids DO watch too much tv. I want this to stop, but don't know how to get it stop without there being World War III at my house. I put them to bed at 7:00 only to let them watch TV until 9:00. I know, I know, I should be shot into the mommy hall of no fame for this. It used to be that they fell asleep right after turning the TV on and I could go in and turn it off. Now, they have gotten to where they stay awake until I turn it off at 9:00. I need help and advice from the super mom's out there. I need alternatives to things that can keep my children busy while I'm busy besides TV. Yes, they do play but still. They do each have a TV in their room. Should I take them out and if so, how do I do this without them thinking they are in trouble? HELP!


Debbi said...

I am no super mom. We never had tv's in our bedrooms growing up and I don't ever want my kids to have one either, try taking them out for a while. I told my kids it was broken for that week that we went without - I had to have alist of other alternative activities because they did want other things to do with their time but it was fun.

Maybe only set the the timer (like shelley) and when it's done they are done with the tv - or allow them only a certain amount of shows, like one show a day, so they have to pick and be responsible for their actions Like if they pick the first thing they find, watch it and then complain when their favorite show comes on later it's their own fault and they learn to make better choices. I do that with Gage - since he loves Super Why, I tell him he can watch that only if he gets dressed and he always want to watch the shows before it but I tell him if he does then can't watch super why, he always runs to turn it off so fast!

I'll try to think of more, but you are a super mom, every one struggles with things and I think the tv is a big one for everyone!

Debbi said...

ok, I have to comment again because I want to read the other ideas, and I forgot to click the email box - you can call me a dork now.

The Perry Family said...

dork!! haha just picking! thanks debbi!!

K.T. is Mommatude said...

Yeah,not a supermom here.LOL,Wingin it-thats what I have done most of their lives.My kids all have TV's in their rooms as well,so as far as how to take it out-I am in the same predicament as you...LOL.I like Debbi's idea for choosing shows.
And of course I am going to try Shelley's idea...for the backtalking and such,because that is a problem at my house,as well as sibling fightery(LOL,okay so I made up a word).

Our mothers werent always sure of themselves and their mothers before them,so I just try to do the best that I can and when I find something that works, I stick to that.

Crystal said...

This is definitely not advise from a super mom, but rather a fellow mom also trying to be better. I know what you mean about the TV thing. I am trying to combat that problem with Ella now before it gets out of control. Some days when she is at Grandma's, she watches TV all day long!! Even just a little bit really starts to add up fast. Maybe try what Debbi did with not watching TV as a family for a week or two. That would be a great time to take the TVs out of their room. It will force them to find ways of being creative to entertain themselves. Then slowly add it back in in small doses. Or just really break their TVs :) I remember when I was a kid I told my step-mom I was bored all the time. We always found something to do though which usually consisted of us making something up.

There are two books that I think would help you out. They are called "The Five Love Languages for Kids" and "Personality Plus for Kids". The first book will help you figure out how your children feel love and the second will help you figure out what kind of personality they have. This will help you parent each of your children individually because I'm sure after reading these two books you will start to see all the many ways they are different. They also have adult versions of these two books which I really like. They will help you with your marriage and with other relationships. They are really good ones.

Hope this helps. If I think of anything else, I will let you know.

Rosjuane said...

Oh man I have no advice!! I'm in awe of the supermom!!

The Perry Family said...

thanks crystal!! i think i will order those books today! and thanks debbi for your ideas and thanks kt and rosjuane for the are right, we take it one day at a time! thanks guys!

Shelley said...

My kids do have tv's in their rooms, and they always will! When they DO earn tv time, it is also alone time for me and Michael and I don't want to watch Hannah Montana in my living room just because they do. We do watch kid movies with them in my room, all piled in my bed, pretty often, but that's when it is all 4 of us, so I honestly do consider it being family time.
You will learn to love the timer if you do it. You will actually start to hear MOMMA!! What can I do to earn privileges?? And often, mine don't pick to watch tv, they pick to be able to use art supplies in their room, which is normally only allowed in my kitchen. They are learning to be careful in their rooms with them now, which is great. Mine usually watch about 30 mins of tv a day. I don't mind that a bit :)

Maury Draper said...

I am late to this post, but I just wanted to say you are NOT a poopy Mom!! Being a mom is so hard, and you just have to take each day as it comes. There have been many times in the past that I put my kids to bed with a t.v.

You asked about activities to do with the kids, and I wanted to do a blog post for everyone to comment on, I may never get around to it though.

On the t.v.'s, we used to have the same problem, they would just stay up later and later watching it. So, we finally just took it out of the room. I can't remember the reason we told the kids, they may have been in trouble at the time, so that gave us a good reason. Or other times we just told them that we were sorry, but they watched it too much, and there were new rules, and they got over that pretty quick. Anyway, we only have one t.v. for them, and now they all have their own room. We don't have anything hooked up to it, so they can only watch movies on it. They don't care to stay in their room unless it is nighttime, so they don't watch it much, but we do let them have a "campout" or "sleepover" on the weekends where they can watch the movie, and they all pile up in the room together in the floor, and it is exciting to them, so that is a reward if they go to bed good on the other nights.

Good luck. I know it is hard to do stuff b/c you don't want to seem mean, but with my kids, I have learned if you just explain your reasoning with them, they get over it pretty quick.

Maybe instead of t.v. time, you tell them you will spend a few minutes indiv with each child reading them a book before bed or something. (oh, and just b/c I have suggestions, does not mean I do it perfect at my house, bedtime is still a battle for us, and if we had to actually get up early in the morning, it would be horrible! We are fortunate enough to be able to be relaxed with it here.